It's my birthday today, so I've compiled a list of things that everyone needs to know about being the Birthday Boss. It's already 7:45pm, so sadly it's a little late for my family to reform for this year, but don't worry because I'll personally stick this post on the fridge for next year.
Birthday Boss Rules
- The Birthday Boss does not have to meet with undesirables today. That may or may not include in laws who want to 'pop in for a cuppa'
- Birthday Boss should not have to prepare dinner, nor should they have the pressure put upon them to decide where to dine out
- If you take Birthday Boss somewhere crap for dinner, they are well within their rights to complain, even if you gave them the option of choosing the venue and they declined
- If any small people should require assistance in bum-wiping, it is undeniably NOT the Birthday Boss's burden to bare today
- In the unfortunate circumstance where the Birthday Boss has to work on their special day, it is of utmost importance that you give appropriate attention and sympathy to their weary bodies at the end of the day. Foot rubs aren't out
- 'But it's my birthday' is basically the all-access veto to any and every chore; baths to be run, stories to be read, dishes to be done. It's only one day of the year, and if the Birthday Boss happens to be a mum, you know damn well she has to do this crap 364 other days this year
That about covers it.
I had a pretty decent birthday, but with a little help raising awareness about these important rules I think we can improve. And just in time for me to turn a quarter of a century in '12.